PRECISE SWISHING AT THE DENTIST'S

This woman is holding a tiny cup of mouthwash, dentist office strength, I assume.

Last week I was someone just like this, only I wasn't smiling.  I went to the dentist office right on time, for once, and had my teeth cleaned.

At the end of the cleaning

the cleaning person handed my a tiny cup.  Just like in the picture.  She said "Divide it in three parts, and swish each time for sixty seconds."

Complicated, I thought.  A flair of irritation.  Wasn't it enough that I had shown up to allow her to do her job, and now she was telling me to do something on my own?  What happened to the swish and spit days.

She handed me the suction thing.  "Use as needed," she said.  "DO NOT swallow any of it."

So now she had added a danger note to the precision part.

A familiar flash of resentment.  I wanted to toss off the cup in one fell swoop, swish for three seconds, and swallow.  So there.

But no, I said to self.  You are grown up now, remember?  You like to do the right thing--

I eyed the tiny amount in the cup.  Was it even possible to divide this minute amount into three parts?  What would happen if I messed up?  If I could only create two, not three, portions out of the pink stuff--

I liked the pink color.  And too, I am fascinated by the etiquette that grows up around all our daily activities, like playing tennis, which I don't, but you get the picture.

I took a sip.  I swished and swished and swished as I tried to count to sixty.  Swished and swished, I tell you.  Felt anxious about swallowing even a speck.  Swished till I dropped.  Thirty seconds.  I suctioned the stuff out.

Second teeny little slurp...swish swish...swish oops did I swallow some?

Third tear drop of mouthwash...swish...spit...no, slurp..."All done," I said, beads of sweat dripping into my clean mouth.

"Already?" she said.  Disbelief in her voice.  "Sixty counts?"

I indicated the empty cup.  She raised an eyebrow--

Her blue eyes stared hard at me over her mask.

"Sixty seconds...yes...um...almost sure...probably...maybe...." I whispered.  Very politely. 

 

Comments

[George Quirk]

Some say there is an art in squishing and gargling your mouthwash. That may be true, but the important thing is to keep the mouthwash in your mouth for at least a minute. This way, it can penetrate in between teeth and kill all the bacteria in your mouth.